(Yugamine-Ena!)(You got me mad now!)
Translated by Anivyl, Lickymee
Edited by Ice Phantom, Ruzenor
LICKYMEE:THIS WHOLE CHAPTER IS A REFERENCE TO THIS SHIT. WARNING, IT’S VERY NSFW, AND VERY, VERY GAY. BEST IF YOU DON’T CLICK ON IT!(I know you’re gonna do it anyways, so at least make sure you’re alone when you are watching this……)
I was in the dormitory watching a famous video clip called [Aniki Wrestling].
[Oh my shoulder!!]
Two white naked macho men, dressed only in underwear, were trying their best to perform joint locks as they fought with each other.
……No, don’t get me wrong.
I’m only watching this because it’s popular online.
As the name suggests, Aniki Wrestling sounds like a video that only has a small audience.
Though for some reason, it seems to be rather popular, with over 500000 views online.
Also, there were many commentaries from viewers on the video
It was definitely interesting when those macho men start groaning loudly, especially when they went “UGH——!”.
Yet, what made it more intense was when the ‘mondegreen¹ subtitles’ written by the viewers appeared on-screen.
(Cream Stew Ikeda!!) (What are you doing? Get up!)
Who the hell is Ikeda (lol)
Though if you listen closely, it does sound like that’s what he said.
When such artistic commentary was included,, “Aniki Wrestling” became a unique and realistic netabare² video.
Today is the first time I have seen it, so I felt rather amazed..
*SPANK* *SPANK* (A macho guy hitting another macho guy’s ass)
“Honey trap! ”(mondegreen)
However, sitting in your own room while laughing excessively at a gay video…… It probably wouldn’t look good in the eyes of other people, I guess.
Although such thoughts appeared in my mind, in this school I was already branded as a man with a fetish for macho men.
“AAAHHHH———— AAAHHHH———— !”
If an ojou-sama saw me in this state now, it would be the end for me.
I knelt in the position of dogeza in front of Aika.
Aika, who was sitting on the bed, folded her arms as she looked down towards me.
With medium length twin-tails and a pair of watery eyes positioned a little high on her face, she looked more like a lively little puppy instead of an ojou-sama—— this was Tenkuubashi Aika.
Between Aika, who was on the bed looking down at me, and the me who was fully dressed in white as I knelt on the floor, was a mobile phone.
“You got me mad now!”(mondegreen)
Just like the hooting of an owl, the video kept repeating.
“……It’s a misunderstanding.”
“What’s a misunderstanding?”
As if she was thinking about the past, Aika sighed like how a mother would when she had thoughts like ‘How did I manage to raise such a child’, all the while looking at me with eyes of anger and sadness.
I swear, I’m not gay.
As a ‘shomin sample’, I was abducted to Sekain Girls Academy, a school hidden from the outside world where the ojou-samas of different backgrounds gather.
And one of the biggest reasons why I was “chosen”, was because I am a “macho man fanatic with no interest in girls”.
Of course, this was all just a misunderstanding. However, if this information was to be exposed, to protect the chastity of these ojou-samas, I will be put through a surgical operation to ensure I will have no descendants.
Therefore, for the sake of keeping my… lineage, I had no choice but to keep up the lies in front of every staff at the school.
But even though that’s the case, I definitely didn’t want the ojou-samas to know this..
“Eh? What’s a misunderstanding?
“……Among the commoners, this video is very popular!”
*SPANK* *SPANK*(More ass slapping)
“IT DOESN’T MATTER!”(mondegreen)
Aika glared at me angrily.
“No matter what, I won’t be tricked by this.”
“It’s true! There’s is a crazy amount of view counts on this video.”
“Hmph! That’s not possible. If that’s true, doesn’t that mean that commoners are all perverted? That’s not possible!”
“AHH……..*SPANK SPANK* AHHHH! *SPANK SPANK*OHHHHHHH———— Sugamo prison!(mondegreen) AHH————Kazuya————Kazuya-kun, striped panties!(mondegreen)（So come on please! How’s that!! )
“Don’t you feel ashamed of spouting such nonsense? Quick, apologize to the other commoners out there!”
……I was merely stating the truth, though.
However, I didn’t think that I would be able to convince her.
Now, I can completely understand the feelings of Galileo, who was banished to an isle over his theories on heliocentrism.
“Come to think about it, you had yelled strange things before too.
Oh, are you talking about that time where I yelled ‘If I could, I would like to spend my life squeezed between the butt cheeks of muscled men!!’ in public?
“At that time, you claimed that ‘I was so flustered back then, so I don’t remember what I said’…… it wasn’t true, was it!”
“Regardless, everyone else should be here soon, so I’ll listen to your explanations later.”
—— Damn it.
I don’t really care how Aika thinks of me, but I don’t really want Reiko and Hakua to misunderstand.
Karen though…… well, who cares about her?
“Therefore,I’ll confiscate this thing first.”
Aika started reaching for the mobile phone.
“Don’t be too hasty, please let me explain!”
I quickly grabbed Aika’s hand.
Seeing that everyone else weren’t here yet, I have to take this opportunity to reduce this misunderstanding of Tsunpure-san here as much as possible for peace to prevail.
“I’ll explain from the start.”
I put on my most serious face and attitude, and sat closer to Aika.
I am not sure why, but Aika, whose hands I was still holding, started blushing.
I guess she must be surprised. Though it looks like she’s willing to listen to me now.
“Firstly, I’ll make it clear.”
“I don’t like muscular macho men. What I like are gir……”
“I have brought your clean laundry.” (Kujou san)
“NO, I LOVE MUSCLES! I LOVE THEM WAY MORE THAN I LOVE THIS EARTH!”
My personal maid, Kujou-san, carried a neat stack of clothes in. With contempt in her eyes, she looked at me with eyes of approval.
Said Kujou-san as she went past my side and headed towards the wardrobe behind me.
I prostrated in the position of gotaitouchi³ towards Aika.
As to what it means, it was a Buddhist ritual where one lays on the floor with his entire body stretched in a prayer.
While Aika sat on the bed hugging her legs as she looked at me with a cold glare very similar to Kujou-san’s.
Sweat started to form on my forehead.
What do I do? Was there any excuse that I could use to pass through this obstacle and reduce the damage to it’s minimum?
“……….I am interested in wrestling.”
“Because of stark-naked men tossing and turning around?”
“No, not like that. It’s just a coincidence——”
“Then why didn’t you say so earlier? You even said such a pathetic lie about it being famous among commoners!”
This fellow, to be so sharp at times like this……!
“……Because I felt embarrassed.”
“About you loving muscles more than the Earth?”
“Not that……Right, fortune telling! My fortune said that my luck is the worst! And it offered wrestling as a solution! For a man like me to believe in mere fortune telling, it feels kind of embarrassing! So……”
I know I said it, but it still feels painful.
Aika’s eyes gleamed with excitement.
“What’s a commoner’s fortune telling like!?”
Aaaand she took the bait.
……Well, apparently I was saved.
1.Mondegreen: A mondegreen is a mishearing or misinterpretation of a phrase as a result of near-homophony, in a way that gives it a new meaning.
2.Netabare: A spoiler; something that spoils the ending of a story or movie.
3.Gotaitouchi is the highest form of prostration reserved for the Buddha only, even beyond dogeza.